Watchers of the amazing Mr. Colbert know that one of Stephen's biggest faux fears is bears.
Tongue-in-cheek, he has often warned viewers about these "godless killing machines," which, of course, include zombie bears, bear terminators, armored bears with nun-chucks, and sanctimonious enviro-bears out to spread their radical bear agenda (from a story about a CA black bear that accidentally rolled away in, aka "stole," a Prius).
They've made many a list and laugh.
In a Halloween tribute to the guffaws he's given, I present to you:
Stephen Colbert's Nightmare - as experienced by Tehachapi camera trap #s600CF
It all started one quiet late-August afternoon, while #s600CF was taking a well earned siesta. It was well-earned because s600CF had already been in the field for 2 weeks, and had snapped 155 photos, catching 5 different mammal species.
And then, something snuck up and smacked s600CF so hard, it sheared its mounting bolt clean, and launched the cam 6 feet. Where, lying on the ground face up, s600CF slowly awoke...
An aspect about the above hilarious series I really can't explain - the camera was set for night
only. So how/why did it wake up at 2:46pm, in full sun, and take photos of a bear mauling?? To record what might have possibly been its last moments?
After that, s600CF went back into normal night-only mode, waking to take the occasional night time shot of tree branches and whiskers for a week and a half.
Then, 11 days after the bear brutality, to truly add insult to injury, a gray fox came along at 9:39pm and peed all over helpless little s600CF's face...
Which led to s600CF getting peed on by gray foxes at least 2 more times over the next 2 weeks. But it kept working like a champ, taking photos...
You gotta love good humorists - be they human, bear, fox - or camera trap.
Epilogue: s600CF took 233 photos, and ran for over 7 weeks, including 5 weeks of activity and 61 photos after the bear encounter. The very sticky camera has since been de-urinated, glued here and there, and is happily back out in the field.